The Evil Satanic Demonic 666 Unholy iPad

I was going to get an iPod for myself because i felt like it, but then i saw an auction on eBay: "Ipod for only 

9000$

". I was le happy, because now i can save up a lot of money.When i got it, i wanted to see the apps so i can **** around. It had Temple Run 2, i immediatly threw it out of the window ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ . The next day, it was back, this time with a punch, and the punch was delishus. I wanted to see the other apps though, and i found something that could only be created by Satan himself!!!!!

''flappy bird''


Oops, that was a typo, let me try again ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ
Ahem...

''FAPPY BIRD D:''


There was a voice saying "Play it", it was my friend... so i threw him out of the window ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ <----- (Why do i keep making dis face)
I decided to play Fappy bird for the shits and giggles, unfortunately, it was only shits.
IT WAS RED AND DAYMONIC AND  TEH CITY WAS ON FIREEEE
ALSO TEH PIPES MADE A SKELETON POP OUT WHEN YOU DIE D:
''3 hours later....''
"Im at 666 gaize, im a BOSS" Then i died...
Oh boy, i shouldnt have done that.
FAPPY BIRD POPPED OUT WITH RED EYES AND THERE WAS BLAWD EVERYWHERE AND TEH CITY EXPLODED AND EVERYONE DIED AND ALL THE POTATOS ARE GONE AND SOMEONE ATE THA LAST PIE.
WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO?
Then a really  idea came to my head ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ <---- (Seriously, writer, y u keep making dis face)
Im gonna play Justin Bieber and end this demonic satan unholy potato-hating Antichrist Satanic motherf*cking pie eating cookie stealing PATRIXXXXX hating game!EVEN IF IT COSTS ME MY EARS!
I put on my headphones(sound blockers), and played the "music" as you would say
The iPod exploded in a debris of blawd and goar and satanz and evil half eaten cookies and low-end toilets.A skeleton popped out, demanding a cookie for destroying Satans creation. I WAS 

NOT

 GIVING OUT MY COOOKIE
So we fought until a Stereotypical British dude went berserk with tea, and killed everyone.
I am typing this as a ghost :P Loololollololol 
* Skeleton pops out*
THE END ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ <---- (FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU)